All good partners raise your hands. Image source: freedigitalphotos.net
Being in love with your partner encompasses real love; not the fantasy, infatuation or lust that can come with being in love with someone. It is all about accepting them completely. It's accepting them for who they are; their traits and personality, as well as their good points and even their faults.
Nobody is perfect, therefore nobody can have a perfect partner. It simply does not exist. That feeling of true love is magical and extremely powerful. It is also hard work. Being in love is not all about teddy bears and roses. It takes time, commitment, teamwork, open communication and a desire to work out your differences. Even if this means having to compromise.
It's loving you partner and seeing them as amazing, whether they are in formal wear or pyjamas. It's holding their hair back when they're unwell. It's wanting to hold them even if they are wet and filthy. It's all about complimenting them when they least expect it; out of the blue and just because they want to. It's standing up for them; only gossiping about how great they are, and longing for them when they are away.
If you truly love someone, you should love them even when they have no make up, crazy hair and track suit pants on. Looking pristine and fabulous all the time is not real. Nor is it always possible.
Are you a good partner? How much are you putting into the relationship? Is each partner putting in their fair share?
1) Am I putting enough time, effort and communication into the relationship? Is it equal on both sides?
2) Do you love your partner for who they are inside as well as out?
3) Do you put them first and treat them the way a lover should?
4) If they were disfigured in an accident, would you still stand by them and continue to love them?
5) Would you still love them if they gained weight, started to lose their hair or got wrinkles?
6) What if they became physically or mentally ill?
7) Would you more away from your work, family or friends for them?
8)Can you love them without trying or hoping to change them including their faults?
9) In a disagreement, is your aim to be right or to make things better?
10) Will you be there in the bad times as well as the good ones?
11) Are you faithful and exclusive to them?
Lust comes easily. Love takes time, dedication and involves us getting to know all about the other person. Trust is also a process, built up over time and experience. It's hard to gain trust, yet it is easily broken. When we have someone's trust we should treasure it.
Love is acknowledging that they are who they are, and not trying to change them. If you want to grow old with this person; spend a lifetime with them, and then you must love them for who and what they are; not who or what you want them to be. Love them faults, and all or choose to let them go. Even if their opinions vary from yours; remember we have different opinions to others as all human beings do.
We all have times when we haven't shaved; are having a bad hair day; feel unwell and can't do our normal tasks, and days were everything has gone wrong and we feel low. Days where we can't get dressed, be good company or even get up out of bed.
- You only get out what you put in.
- What goes around, comes around.
- You can't change other people.
- We are all unique and that's ok.
- Love takes work, commitment and a mutual understanding and respect.
We all deserve to have partners that treasure us, dote on us and love us no matter what.