Image Courtesy of Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net Compliments rule
Compliments enrich a love based relationship, and they only do if they're accepted by the other party. Compliments are gifts, and gifts are not given until they're received. Case in point. My favourite word in the English language right now: thank you.
So simple, yet not often said enough. Even if you aren't religious or philosophical, we cannot even thank our creator enough. That creator who put his one and only son to die on the cross for us, for our salvation. For him, we are exalted when we treat each other with respect. Respect not just with love based relationships, but with life and others as a whole.
The penny drops. That's right. In order to attract and maintain a loving relationship in your life, you need to respect other people. However, you cannot respect other people until you know how to (deep down) respect yourself. This begins with (obviously) liking yourself, however to also give "thanks" for when others compliment you.
You can never give too many compliments to your loved one. Compliment them about their work if their work is visible in the public eye. If not, compliment them on their intelligence, and even on something they're wearing. Even better: compliment them for who they are as people. No one is perfect, nor will they be ever be.
Humbleness has no place in a love based relationship. Your partner might get hurt or embarrassed if you diffuse the power of their compliment by saying things such as:
"I know I can do better than that though." "Oh, sure - yet X is better than me at it." "If it wasn't for that pimple."
And so on. You get the drift.
Remember to back up your compliment with: "thank you very much." Even with: "I love you, you're so sweet." Back to my partner when he compliments me when I least expect it: "You're a really great man."
As you know, complimenting each other is two way traffic.
Examples of compliments I've given my partner in line with his work - yet his work is super private:
"You are so smart. You really know so much about this topic at hand."
"These clients are lining up for you, because you are amazing, because you are you. You're really great at your work. You're great. You're awesome."
"That is so amazing that you're getting headhunted. You are so great at what you do. You're such a smart and sweet man."
Examples of compliments I've received from my partner in line with my work - where my work is more public:
"Must say that I am really impressed with the article. Your creativity and way with words shines through. I am pleased to hear that your article has been successful. It was an excellent piece. I was surprised that you had the concentration to write such quality at that time of night."
The above compliment was when I shared a published article with him on a play I was invited to see, in exchange for a feature article review on it. I was given two tickets, and I invited my man to come with me.
"It looks like you are very busy with the chocolate tour with all the booked signs. I can see why. Your tour web page does a great job of drawing peoples attention to what a great experience the tour is."
I was amazed and taken back with such compliments that blew me away.
The key points to take away from this article:
Quality compliments = quality relationship.
Compliments cut both ways. Put some thought and positive energy into them.
Do not fault find in response. Give a big burst of thanks and praise to your partner without any ego involved, and without sounding cocky.