The question of whether you should be friends with your ex does not come with a simple answer. Some people seem to believe that at all times it is just not cool or inappropriate to be friends with an ex - no matter the circumstance of the relationship. However, I donít think that one should rule out a friendship based on the fact that a love relationship failed. What if that person was your best friend for five years? What if you were married to them and had children together? What if they were your first love? These people will always be an important part of your life, whether you want to admit it or not.
I moved across the world for a guy when I was just 18 years old. I spent four years with him. We had an apartment together, and had plans for the future Ė everything youíd expect a young couple to have, we had. It fell apart though, and after a very painful year or so, we both grew to realise that it was a good thing it had ended, and also became friends again after some time apart. Now he is someone that I can talk to about pretty much everything, and I believe will be a friend that Iíll have for a long, long time. However, quite a few of my friends think itís a bit weird or donít understand why I am still hanging out with him. They see it as strange, because of all the bad things that happened between us.
But as weird as it was, and as weird as it may be, I decided I could be friends with him and value that friendship very much. I believe he feels the same way. So I ignore those friends that look at me strangely, and instead enjoy the friendship that I was able to uncover underneath the rubble of a badly ended relationship.
It wasnít easy to get to this stage with him though. In fact it took about two years of hatred, fighting, yelling, and finally a long span of time not talking at all, before we were able to break through to the other side. Perhaps this whole ordeal just seems too much to go through, and maybe to you itís not worth it. But for me, here was someone who had been my best friend for six years, and was the person who knew me best in my new home. If you are struggling with talking to an ex, just take some time to think about whether a friendship with them would be beneficial. Maybe it wonít, maybe it will. Every situation is different, but I am a strong believer in fighting for someone and something I care about.