Home    Subscribe    Write for Us    FAQ    Contact    HubGarden    Login

Marriage, Divorce And After

by Marie Vonow (follow)
Chief editor: readyforpets.com Blogs:www.quora.com/profile/Marie-Vonow/blogs Other:www.weekendnotes.com/profile/marie-vonow/
Love (293)      Marriage (39)      Relationship (17)      Friends (13)      Divorce (7)      Separation (5)     


Divorce, friends, Love, Marriage, Relationship, Separation


You meet a guy. There is an attraction. You start dating and get to know each other. He is such a great guy and he knows how to make you laugh. You have so much in common and start planning a future together. You get married or you just move in together. This is going to be forever.

Fast forward, five, ten, fifteen years or even two or three decades. So much has changed. You separate and get divorced. In the case of a de facto relationship you just separate but the stress is no easier to handle.

There are many reasons for a relationship to end. In some circumstances there is abuse and the relationship may need to end completely for safety reasons. The person who has been abused may need to be isolated from the other person in order to slowly rebuild their self esteem.

In other situations maybe something can be salvaged from the relationship. To me it seems a shame when two people have been in love and experienced so much together but end up hating each other. Some couples no longer refer to the other party by their real name but use some derogatory term instead. They cannot be in the same room and canít be civil to each other. This situation is particularly awkward when there are young children involved and access visits to be organised.

Breaking up hurts and it is likely events over months or years before the final split have caused pain and disillusionment. Perhaps the split came as a shock with one party having been unaware of how the other was feeling. Whatever the circumstances, separation is not easy.

There is likely to be a time of emotional upheaval with feelings of hurt, disappointment, anger, confusion and perhaps guilt. There may be a feeling of relief.

However, you are so used to being part of a couple and now you are without a partner. What do you do now?

Adjustments need to be made. Living arrangements, care for any children and finances have to be sorted out. Perhaps there is a house to be sold and the proceeds divided. Furniture and other property have to be divided. Who gets the car? Who gets the dog? How do you deal with mutual friends?

Hopefully, as time passes things will get a little easier. Perhaps a time will come when you can salvage something from the relationship that has ended.

Each couple has their own way of coping with the end of a relationship. It is tricky to decide what will work and there may be lots of trial and error. If the two parties remain friends but are still in frequent contact this can jeopardise the success of new relationships.

One party may hope reconciliation is possible when the reality is that it isnít. The children may be confused.

Some sort of boundaries and rules may need to be worked out, especially if your homes are in close proximity. How often will you be in contact? When is it okay to phone? There are no hard and fast rules about what is appropriate and what will work.

Looking back on my two marriages, both having ended in divorce I can appreciate the positive things that came out of both. I certainly do not wish to return to either relationship but with the passing of the years have accepted what has happened. I appreciate the fact both guys are polite if we need to discuss anything. I have attended a funeral for a parent of both of my exes and am grateful their family members did not make me feel uncomfortable when I attended to pay my respect. I am glad what started out as love has not ended in hate.

# Divorce
# Friends
# Love
# Marriage
# Relationship
# Separation
I like this Article - 3
More Articles by Marie Vonow
To say online dating is becoming increasingly popular is stating the obvious
116 views
One of the needs of being a human being is to be loved
229 views
The 'institution' of marriage is just one aspect of society that has undergone considerable chang...
126 views
Internet dating sites are increasingly popular as a way of finding that elusive 'someone'
44 views
Have you ever been in contact with an ex and had him ask you, totally clueless, 'Why did we break ...
100 views
Breaking up is hard
118 views
view all articles by Marie Vonow
Articles by Marie Vonow on Other Hubs
7 likes
I get excited about starting a new year
254 views
ID: 34637
[ Submit a Comment ]
Trending Articles
Recently I have heard some disastrous dating stories from my single friends
20494 views
Relationships guru Dr Gary Chapman purports that there are five different ways that lovers can c...
10838 views
When it comes to the subject of love, everybody has a story to tell
1084 views
The male penguin searches the entire beach for the perfect pebble when he has found the one he...
11308 views
I wrote this letter thinking of the person I briefly spent time with more than a month ago
1224 views
We can be blessed and have many friends, through work, school, social activities or social media...
by SJP
3373 views
A few years ago I fell in love
3058 views
It's so very important that we learn from the experiences of our yesterdays - but it is equally ...
1341 views
He also would have his phone on silent and in his pocket
2047 views
It had been six months since Rose had become single and she thought now is the time to try inter...
249 views
Categories
Featured on Other Hubs
 
Copyright 2012-2017 On Topic Media PTY LTD. ABN 18113479226. mobile version