Cheating is never a nice topic. It is never one that we like to talk about, and one which can bring about mixed feelings. It is said that you should never bring up the past unless it makes you smile. While this is true, however sometimes in order to actually move forward, you must revisit your past. Cheating is something which brings about anger, pain and also sadness. It is a feeling of helplessness, bitterness and resentment. The typical solution to overcome cheating is to leave the cheating partner and move forward in a more positive direction away from the pain.
However, what if you could overcome the pain? What if you could move forward and eventually find happiness with that person; true happiness which lasted a lifetime? Personally, I know how cheating feels, and it is a harsh emotion which can often be crippling; but there is always a solution to repair your broken heart, and there is always a way to get you back to feeling on top of the world.
To do so, you must first find the root of the actual problem. While we all know what happens when a person cheats, do we really know what that person is thinking? What emotions they are actually carrying? While women may cheat and create an emotional bond with that other man; yet when men cheat, they are typically not looking for a new relationship with that person, and they do not have emotions or feelings for them.
Men’s sensors thrive on the physical being of a woman only. By this, it means that they do not find the woman more attractive than you, but whoever is around at the time is physically enough for them. However, what many people don’t realise (and yes we understand that all men are different) is that a feeling of inadequacy and insecurity within a relationship can lead to cheating. Men may feel insecure about themselves within a relationship, or feel insecure about their achievements or current life status, and this can unfortunately lead to cheating. For example; a woman who earns more than her male partner may make the male feel insecure about his situation. Does this mean he will cheat? No of course not, because not all men cheat, however, this can cause a male to feel anxious or insecure because men take their role within a family unit very seriously.
Unfortunately, as a result of cheating, too many women blame theirselves for what has happened, when in actual fact, the root of the issue has or had nothing to do with the woman. While there is no justification for cheating by any means, it is important to understand the root of the cheating, rather than just dismissing it all together. For example; if you made an unforgiveable mistake but expected your partner to forgive you and carry on with your life after this as if nothing had happened, would you be willing to do the same for your partner? We often have to put ourselves in the shoes of others before making drastic choices and changes to our life.
Many people also say “once a cheater, always a cheater." This is only the case, if you allow them to believe that you will stand for it again. Taking a person back after they have cheated on you is not a sign of weakness, and it is not grounds for them to go out and cheat again; in fact it is showing them that while you dont condone the actions they have committed, you are strong enough to know that as human beings we make mistakes, and I am going to give you one more chance to prove to me that this relationship is exactly what you want. If you are thinking"Who wants to go through all of that hassle of rebuilding the relationship?” then taking a person back is not for you. However, you must also remember that no relationship is going to be a walk in the park.
Cheating can occur in any relationship, no matter who you are. Singers, actresses, dancers, philanthropists and women of all walks of life, have been or may be going through issues regarding cheating. There are many women I know of, including myself who stand strong and have overcome those issues because how you choose to handle and deal with situations can in actual fact shape your entire life journey. Now I am not saying that when a person cheats on you, you should stay. Not at all. But if you feel as if that person is genuinely willing to change, willing to go to counselling with you (in order to receive tools on how to better your relationship) and that they are truly remorseful and sorry for their actions; then there is no reason why a person should not receive a second chance.
Only you know how you feel. Only you know what you want to deal with, and only you know what you are capable of overcoming. Never stay in a relationship in which you cannot trust the person, or you are not happy with that person. Only you can determine what is best for you. Always follow your heart.
What are your thoughts on cheating? As a woman, would you stay? As a man, would you expect your woman to stay?