On lucky days I get to play ladies. Playing ladies is the time I get to do as I please.
A lucky day is when I am home alone, when tvs and radios are off. When the phone ringer is turned off and I pretend not to be home.
I value this time. It feels luxurious, decadent almost and I relish in the intense freedom of being in my own space - alone.
I'll eat in bed if I want on those days/partial days, watch movies, browse the net or write and nap when I feel the urge.
It is a positive solitude, a relaxing, replenishing time. It's a 'time out' without the precursory negative, an alternate pampering of oneself.
The younger me would have recoiled at the thought of alone-ness - always having been busy with a million things that had to be done, day in, day out - year in, year out.
But it is because of the younger me's busy-ness that I appreciate the now me's quietness, and I fiercely protect it - on the days I play ladies.
# Time Out