Home    Subscribe    Write for Us    FAQ    Contact    HubGarden    Login

Ruining it for the Rest of Us

by Katie (follow)
Dating (105)      Feelings (15)      Girlfriend (3)      Sex (2)      Casual (2)      Denial (1)     


Over the years dating has changed, and more recently it has become common for women to sleep with men that they aren't dating. One night stands and casual sex partners. But what does it mean for those of us who don't agree?

Sometimes looking for a relationship is hard. A friend told me it's harder to get into a relationship as you are getting closer to thirty. What I told her was that you can't make someone go out with you if they don't want a girlfriend.

For men it is easy to pick up a girl for sex and have no strings attached, and these women are ruining for the rest of us. If men couldn't get sex, and all women said they had to be dating first, then it wouldn't be so hard to get a boyfriend.

I've met a lot of men who take my phone number and they say they don't want a relationship. I don't want to be that girl who can't count how many people she has slept with on her fingers and toes. So I think there is nothing wrong with asking someone what they are looking for. Not instantly of course, but when things start moving on from the first date.

I don't want to be hurt, and finding out someone doesn't want to go out with you after chatting for a week or two and maybe the occasional dinner or movie date, is a lot easier to get over for me, than to get over someone that I have been intimate with.

I've often thought maybe time will help? Right? Not always. In my experience I've found I get hurt even more by keeping a friendship. Sometimes when a guy says that he doesn't want a girlfriend I would continue to be Facebook friends, text and chat occasionally, but it doesn't change things. In fact, it makes things worse for me. When they do finally decide they want a girlfriend. Maybe they fall for a girl they have had sex with. But still I don't go for that so I'll probably never know.

Take for example a guy who said he just wanted some fun. All I replied with was oh ok, and I said that because I was looking for more and I didn't see any reason this conversation needed to continue. However I didn't delete him off my Facebook.

So what happened with him after that? One day I saw a post that mentioned him having a girlfriend. When I read it, I was sad, feeling sick to my stomach. I had denied that I had feelings, but when it came to it, I couldn't help the feelings that just happened to give me this gut wrenching feeling.

So what have I learned? Don't deny your feelings. If I like someone who doesn't want the same things as me, it's much easier to delete them and not know what they are getting up to.

# Sex
# Dating
# Girlfriend
# Casual
# Feelings
# Denial





Girl taking pants off
courtesy of adamr / freedigitalphotos.net
I like this Article - 3
More Articles by Katie
You are probably wondering how I can connect bullying and relationships, but as someone who know...
44 views
We all know it's important to nurture our relationships with others, and that our time on earth ...
204 views
Sometimes a relationship doesn't work because one person in the relationship suffers depression,...
190 views
There's something magical about finding the one and knowing they are who you want to spend the r...
75 views
A few months ago I found out a guy I was friends with was a real douche bag, and I said see ya l...
62 views
Let's talk about sex, and in particular sex on the first date
101 views
view all articles by Katie
ID: 14931
[ Submit a Comment ]
Trending Articles
Relationships guru Dr Gary Chapman purports that there are five different ways that lovers can c...
12819 views
Recently I have heard some disastrous dating stories from my single friends
23099 views
Cheating is never a nice topic
2732 views
It's so very important that we learn from the experiences of our yesterdays - but it is equally ...
1669 views
One reads lots of surprising information on the internet
155 views
One of the current living/ accommodation options for a couple who are committed to each other is L...
367 views
Minor verbal squirmishes can be pretty upsetting enough, and they can grow into fully fledged fa...
110 views
Love can come and go unexpectedly
118 views
When you hear that about 80 million bacteria are exchanged in a 10 second pash you could think 'Ew...
163 views
You already might have seen and read hundreds of and I'm pretty sure that more than 80% of the ...
282 views
Categories
 
Copyright 2012-2018 OatLabs ABN 18113479226. mobile version