As we progress further into the 21st century and women start to embrace their new roles as co-breadwinners, the laws of dating and courtship become increasingly blurred. The question remains; at the end of the night, who picks up the cheque? Questions about money are uncomfortable. Questions about money and etiquette are even more uncomfortable. To avoid the ‘cheque-dance’ (aka both parties pulling out their wallets in a bid for the bill) here are a few things to consider...
Perhaps it’s the woman’s turn?
The greatest luxury of the 21st century for a woman is the freedom to be independent and self sufficient. Like most of you, I work hard and am able to earn a decent income; therefore I am more than capable of taking someone out on a date. However, for some reason it’s still the norm for the man to fix up the bill in order to ‘woo’ the girl.
For me personally this can make me quite uncomfortable, as I’ve never really liked the idea of someone paying my way. On the other hand, I really enjoy taking my partner out for dinner just as much as I enjoy it when they take me out. If you’re both invested and interested in pursuing the relationship, it makes sense to share the cost, and it is only fair to take it in turns.
Some men don’t like it when a woman pays, while others are completely unfazed. You’ll never know until you ask, so It’s important to (for lack of a better phrase) ‘man-up’ and be straight with it. Talk it over with your date and how they've done things before. Did they have a long-term partner who always paid or did they split the bill? If you’re uncomfortable talking about money, it’s best not to assume anything and always come prepared with your wallet. Above all things, you don’t want to go around creating tension where it did not previously exist. Therefore, if the guy is comfortable and more than happy to pay for the first date, don’t fight it and offer instead to pay for the cab home.
Splitting the bill; the end to romance?
As you start dating more, you start spending more. You’re eating out on an average of 2-3 nights per week, not to mention the added cocktails, coffees, gelato's and taxi fares. Dating can be seriously expensive. Whilst the idea of splitting the bill can be horribly unromantic, it’s completely acceptable and can save both parties a lot of money.
At the beginning of a relationship, every outing is considered a date, but as time goes on, dinner is no longer a ‘date’ but a necessity; so I think coming to something equal or close to is important. If a couple splits the bill and shares the necessary cost of living, it makes those special ‘date’ occasions all the more special which is important in a long term relationship.
Try this: to make things simpler, whoever asks who on the date should pick up the cheque? Or to make things even easier, how about taking it in turns? Every couple has a system worked out, whether it be taking it in turns, or the ‘I’ll buy dinner, you buy drinks’ rule.