Mike

I met '' on grindr, (I know, not a great place to meet your first boyfriend but whatever). We talked to each other for about three months before meeting, which felt like a long time to go without meeting someone after talking to them all day every day, but I hadn’t completely exited the closet that was slowly falling to pieces and I was only just figuring out what it meant to be out.

Anyways, after three long months and one drunken weekend where I agreed to finally meet I was stuck, for an entire week I stressed about what I was going to wear, what we were going to talk about and what was I to do if I didn’t like him.

The weekend of our first date rolled around and before long I was standing at his front door with a tub of ice cream and a punnet of strawberries. I still have no clue as to why I chose that combination but I did and they were good together.

I had messaged prior to leaving and he told to just let myself in because he would be in the shower, I did that upon arrival and awkwardly waited in his lounge room, while I waited for him to towel off I contemplated running.

Five minutes went by which felt twelve hours and he finally came out of the bathroom. We were now face to face for the first time. He went in for a hug to greet me. I shook his hand.

Fast forward through the most awkward dinner of my life, (he made chili which was gross and FYI, never cook chili for a first date, actually never cook or eat chili ever) four hours of watching The Beautiful People (which was awful) and then the long awaited goodbye, as I left he hugged me, which I wouldn’t have minded so much if he wasn’t five foot six (I’m six feet tall).

After our awkward first date it wasn’t long until we were intimate, was the first guy I had been with, I lost my virginity to someone I barely knew and in no way loved. Still to this day that is one of the biggest regrets in my life and that’s something I have to live with.

After about two months, ’s not-so-nice side started to come out, he spoke to my friends as though they weren’t relevant, he treated his family like rubbish (surprisingly I ended up liking his family more than him) and he treated me like a child.

I broke up with after he told me I “needed” to move in with him if we were ever going to work out, this came just after he asked my friends if I’d be okay with bringing a third person into our relationship. After these two fun events, I was an outie.

I cried over for about half an hour. It wasn’t long before I was desperate and dateless once again, ’s response to the breakup text I sent him was literally “K” and nothing else.

Two hours later and I was back on grindr. About a day later I had met a few guys on there that were pretty cool.

One guy I met actually came to be a really great friend of mine months later; he still has no clue that I was the guy that told him he was too cute to wear a puka shell necklace and part of me still thinks that if he didn’t have a boyfriend the last time I saw him before I moved, we could have had something.



Image "Contemplation" by Simon Daniel under license cc by 2.0



#_First_Date
#_First_Love
#_Differences



%trulyheart