Home    Subscribe    Write for Us    FAQ    Contact    HubGarden    Login

Singles - Find Your Own Life First

by Seafarrwide (follow)
Check out my blog at seafarrwide.com/ for more about me. Articles on Dating, Travel, Poetry & things to do.
Dating (105)      Internet dating (16)      Finding love (6)      Singles (4)      Interests (3)      Learn (1)      Reinvent (1)      Develop (1)      Searching (1)     


Two girls- taken by me


Recently a friend of mine who is single and over 50 sent me some very distressing messages. A year prior she had ended an emotionally and physically abusive relationship. This friend is usually a very positive happy person and has always amazed me how much energy she has.

But like any of us single people she hopes to find a loving loyal partner to enjoy things with and possibly share a life with one day. But she had hit a wall and now had finally succumbed to the black hole of depression.

This friend had tried Internet Dating for some time and had no success at all. She seemed to be contacted by men she considered too old, too fat, too boring, too sleazy, lived too far and so on.

Finding a man became her only focus to the point it was making her so depressed. She felt ugly and had put on 10 kilos over her desired weight.

One night she sent me texts saying she couldn't take it anymore, the internet made her sick. She said she would even go back to her old abusive boyfriend if he wanted her as it was better than being alone. I was shocked to hear her speak this way after all the horrible things that man had done to her.

After much soft talking about why she needed to stop thinking that way I had to finally deliver some tough love. Be realistic about yourself and what you expect in a partner. It's all very well to expect a super good looking,younger, fit, wealthy, interesting man when you yourself are not any of these things. You have let yourself go and you complain how much weight you have gained yet you do no exercise or dieting. That you are bored and lonely. You are really more bored with yourself.

I suggested things that had helped me once when my children grew up and I got depressed and lonely:-

Above all be thankful for what you have so far in life, good health, family, a job.
Find new interests outside of work.Take up a hobby.
Become an interesting person. Learn a sport, or do a language course. There are so many night courses you can do such as Warringah Community College course
Get Fit. Walk each day. Walk a friend or neighbours Dogs. Join a Gym. Learn Latin American Dancing. Take up boxing get the anger out.
Start a Blog, find your creativity. Have a look at Wordpress
Learn to Meditate. Calm your mind of worrying thoughts. Do Yoga or Pilates.
Volunteer at Hospital - join a Hospital Auxiliary such as Mona Vale Hospital Auxilary
Join Meetup Social Groups There are hundreds of different social groups from every imaginable interest such as Walking, Cafe lovers, Culture loves, Travellers, Art Lovers, Singes, all types of interests and it isn't just for single people.Some activities cost nothing.
If you feel very depressed and unable to start anything then see a counsellor. Medicare will cover the first 6 sessions if you get a referral from your GP. There are also natural alternative medicine to try such as SAMe tablets from Discount vitamin shops I tried this myself and it gave me amazing energy when I was feeling very low. Start at half a tablet early in the day first. If you have heart issues check with a medical professional first.
Try to broaden your friendship base in anyway you can as some friends also have their own friends and family to spend time with. It's not fair to make them feel guilty they can't be with you all the time.
Don't expect others to provide your entertainment and fun. Take control of your own life.

These are just a few things. The aim is to get your own life. It will make you happier more content. You will hopefully attract what you portray or just be too busy that you don't care about meeting a man and then one comes along.



#Singles
#Finding Love
#Internet Dating
#Learn
#Reinvent
#Develop
#Interests
#Searching
#Dating
I like this Article - 1
More Articles by Seafarrwide
I've come to learn a few things about internet dating
118 views
Years ago now when my two children were two and four years of age my relationship with my partner ha...
214 views
We meet a wide range of interesting people in our lives, at school, sports, parenting groups, th...
199 views
Steven finally stopped with his texts and his epic emails
126 views
A couple of weeks ago I was in the city with a female friend
189 views
After a few sessions at Couple's counselling our Counsellor suggested we each make a promise to orga...
158 views
view all articles by Seafarrwide
My Google Plus Profile
ID: 25022
[ Submit a Comment ]
Trending Articles
Relationships guru Dr Gary Chapman purports that there are five different ways that lovers can c...
11988 views
Recently I have heard some disastrous dating stories from my single friends
22737 views
It had been six months since Rose had become single and she thought now is the time to try inter...
563 views
A few years ago I fell in love
3390 views
Cheating is never a nice topic
2489 views
This article was contributed for
187 views
He also would have his phone on silent and in his pocket
2236 views
It is said that couples who are into each other will mirror each other with small gestures and h...
197 views
It's so very important that we learn from the experiences of our yesterdays - but it is equally ...
1619 views
One of the current living/ accommodation options for a couple who are committed to each other is L...
313 views
Categories
 
Copyright 2012-2018 OatLabs ABN 18113479226. mobile version