Reasons why we choose the wrong partner

Reasons why we choose the wrong partner

Posted 2017-09-27 by deentfollow

In today’s time when there’s a lot of competition everywhere, even in the relationships. You’d find everyone around looking for love and finding the same from someone or the other. Love is one of the essential aspects in the Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs and one needs the same no matter how successful he is. But, no matter what you do, you would feel the need of being loved and in order to do that, you have to choose a partner.

For some weird reason, choosing a partner and getting into a relationship sounds like a cake walk when someone else is getting hitched or getting in a relationship. However, when it is our own turn, things can turn nasty and very wrong. You might end up choosing the wrong partner with whom life would not settle down but will take an about-turn. Life gets messy and unhappy when you don’t make the right decision while choosing your better half.

From my personal experience, I have seen numerous families and bonds breaking apart just because one of them didn’t fit quite well in that position. While one would be the victim of the situation, the other would be the culprit (for the time being).

So the question is - why do people choose the wrong partner? Followed are the common problems or reasons stating the same.

1. The fear of being left alone
In today’s time, the worst of the fears that haunt men (or women) is the fear of being left alone. While everyone else around is being picked by someone or the other, it is you who knows the pain of not being loved by anyone. As a part of our growing, we all have a feeling that we need a partner who is not easy to get and is extremely on the positive side. But, that’s not reality. We all accept what comes our way because of the fear of being left alone. Hence, you don’t know what kind of a person is coming your way.

2. The fear of not living life by yourself
While you are a brave-heart on the outside, there’s always a soft corner in the heart which needs someone to be there telling them what can be done and what shouldn’t be. The feeling of fear that you cannot adjust with yourself and all by yourself the entire life is what makes you make choices in a hustle-bustle. Who doesn’t need safety and security in their lives? Everyone wants a relationship that blooms and a partner that sticks through thick & thin. But, in order to have you have to look quite carefully and not rush through. When you rush, you end up making the wrong choices.

3. Pressure from the society
We might be the people who talk a lot about freedom, choices and the freedom to choose what we want, but at the end of the day - pressure from the society is real. Every person around you would have a completely different opinion or better said advice to give you when it comes to having a partner. We are indoctrinated with the impression that we should finally settle down now before you get too old. While all my friends were busy getting married at the age of 25-30, there was this another friend who was building up his life. He finally got married with a girl when he crossed 40. With the mindset of the society and the constant pressure, the majority of men succumb and make the wrong choices.

4. You are wounded and your heart wants someone else
You might have noticed that when a couple breaks up, either one of them or probably both of them start looking for shoulders to cry on as well as share their emptiness. My relationship was something like this. My best friend fixed me with a girl and I was quite happy for a while. Eventually, things started to fall apart and we broke up. It was then when the same friend gave a lot to me and heard me out and within no time we started dating each other.

Did you make a wrong choice? It is never to turn around the mistakes that hurt either one of you and take a detour because failed relationships are way more damaging than anything else.


254594 - 2023-07-19 08:00:50


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